Thank you to everybody that had an opinion about the things I said in the podcast ‘Nhai Onai and the Other Guys.’ I don’t feel like I have to defend them but when do I ever get what I want? So here we are!

#Capital26Free had me as a guest on their podcast and yes, I said things that I wouldn’t allow my client to say out loud. Luckily for me, I am not in that kind of spotlight. When I accepted the invitation to be on the show, I didn’t realise what was going to be discussed. Do I regret what was discussed? Not at all! I feel like being on this podcast is what inspired my blogging theme for this year. I have never been so honest out loud in my whole life! Onai and the rest of the crew had me so comfortable my censorship went out the window and I just let it all out.

Thembi, did you really have to say all of that though?
Yes I did. Why should I be quiet about the things that I have been through. It will not change what happened and how it happened. I don’t feel bad about the dark phases I went through in life and you shouldn’t be ashamed for me on my behalf. I went through it, I survived it and I can now discuss it and look back and laugh.

The nudes thing, was that for real?
Every word in that podcast was for real. Forewarned is forearmed. Now you all know there are nudes somewhere and you will not be shocked when they finally make it to the internet. I took Olivia Pope’s advice and got ahead of it before it blew up on my face.

Am I a closet feminist?
No. I am not a feminist. I believe in some of the things that feminists stand for but I cannot say that I totally subscribe to that ideology. What can I say? I like what I like. It doesn’t mean that I don’t care about the struggle, I do. But the struggle is is a struggle in itself and it keeps warping into something I don’t believe in. It’s perveted. So I have created my own hybrid beliefs between caring for the plight of women and being a Christian woman and that’s okay too.

You shouldn’t have dragged your family out like that
Nothing I said about my people was a lie. For 27 years I’ve been walking on eggshells protecting the feelings of people that didn’t give me a second thought. It’s been killing me trying to be polite, and politically correct while I died slowly on the inside. It shouldn’t have been my burden to bear at all. If they had listened better I wouldn’t have said it out loud like I did. Fortunately, that’s all I had to say on that subject so it will never come up again.

You make a lot of excuses for the things you did.
Seriously? Really? Oh, okay. Firstly, being aware of your brokenness isn’t making excuses it’s enlightment to say the very least. I know what I did and in retrospect I know why I did what I did. I have dealt with the underlying issues that made me crazy as hell but hey, bad habits die hard. I am very aware of my dark side and I try suppress it as much as I can. It’s a daily struggle. Sometimes I win, sometimes I lose.

But you are supposed to be a role model for girls, is this the example you wanna set for them?
Absolutely! Don’t make anybody make you feel dirty, cheap or rejected for the things that you have been through. Own your story. Own the consequences of your decisions. The only person that you are accountable to is you. If you can sleep with your decision at night then to hell with everything else. Do you baby boo. Make this money honey, ain’t nobody mad atcha. Well behaved women seldom make history.

For those that haven’t heard the controversial podcast click the link below to find out what all the hallabaloo is about. Don’t believe the hype, it really wasn’t that bad. And the scary thing is that we barely scratched the surface of all the things I wanted to talk about. This was just the beginning.

If you missed the interview, catch it here