Everytime I watch TV shows and someone discovers someone else’s dirty secret and decides to confront them I think to myself but why? Like that Gumede cop in Kings of Joburg. No back up, no nothing what was she counting on? They were alone which means her death was the only option. I would have kept quiet, played dumb and left the house. Sometimes you have to keep your cards close to the chest and not reveal your hand too soon.

It got me thinking. How many times in our lives does God reveal something to us and we go and share it with anyone who will care to listen? Loose lips sink ships. It’s like when people try to warn a woman about her man, and she goes home to tell the man being cautioned of, will it end well? It’s like an antelope going to tell the lion that, “You know people are always telling me that one day, you will eat me. I don’t believe them zvangu. I think they are just jealous of you.” If you have Netflix, watch #BehindHerEyes you’ll see what I’m talking about.

In the Bible, God calls the one guy in his sleep. The guy gets up to ask the prophet if he’s calling him. The prophet says no. It happens a couple of times. Finally, the prophet says, God is calling you, go back to sleep and hear what he has to say. This shows that God does speak to us, individually. If God wanted to tell the whole world, he would have. If he wanted to tell your friends and family, he would have. He does not need speaking for unless he asks you to specifically do so through a burning bush. Be still. Do you like it when you tell people stuff and they tell other people?

I lost one of my closest friends to something like this. We’d been strained and inconsistent for a while when we set a date to meet in town. I was excited all week. I woke up early on that day because I didn’t want to risk being late cause she disliked tardiness. Loitered in town for hours waiting for our set time. The time came and went. I finally called to ask her where she was and she said at home. I was like cool, another time. Shortly thereafter she drove past me. My heart broke. Shrugged it off. Went home and told my mom what had happened. She advised me to call the friend and confront her. I did just that. It hurt even more because the conversation made the truth clear as day. We have never recovered.


God showed me the truth in a way that I could handle. I hurt myself by trying to negotiate the hard facts. The phone call hurt even more than seeing her with my own eyes. Watched a sermon about how God told Adam not to eat from the tree because he will die. It explained how our minds are not strong enough to handle too much knowledge. Which is why God will shield us from some things with no explanations. He will remove some people quietly. He will wreck some relationships beyond repair. He will hide how people you love genuinely feel about you because you really can’t take how many people in your circle are really not for you. If you were to hear what people say behind your back, do you think you’d still be sane?

I’m one of those people who believe that only God can read your mind. Everything else has to wait for you to divulge the information using your mouth or deeds. The good book literally says He is the only one who knows what’s in your heart. So when he puts things confidentially in your heart, why would you publicize them. He has whispered things to me and said, “just watch and see how it plays out.” He has whispered things to me to help me make decisions which protected me in the long run. I’ve learned not to share my insider trading tips. They are for my attention only.

You need to ask for wisdom and discernment. Ask what you are supposed to do with the revelation that has been entrusted with you. I have learnt that I have to tell my husband why I am telling him something. Sometimes I just need to vent and sometimes I need him to do something about it. If I don’t say upfront, knees will get capped on my behalf.

Is there a time in your life where you shared your plans too soon and they went belly-up?