I don’t swim! Thank you.

1532123_10151892189248207_1849308299_n

Noma-Kay in happier times before the near death experience

I was there, in the death trap called a swimming pool. Playing around with my cousins. I knew full well that I couldn’t swim to save my life, even if there had been a crocodile in the water. But the fear of missing out gripped me like leopard print leggings. I just had to partake in the fun. They say sink or swim, but not me, I held on to the pool edges and went around the whole pool.

Boitumelo Thulo

Boitumelo Thulo

When I arrived to the deep end, my favourite aunt Noma-Kay  decided to crack one of her many jokes. I laughed so hard I let go of the wall. I started sinking faster than non-performing Ministers in Zimbabwe. Reflex said, “Fight the water! Fight for your life!” I struggled. The epitome of futility. I decided I wouldn’t go out with a bang, I stopped struggling and made peace with the Creator. I was dying and I knew it. I could feel the joy continuing all around me hoping they would miss me when I’m gone. Then I felt the wall with my feet. I grabbed it tightly like a free t-shirt at a political rally.

Haven’t been in a swimming pool ever since.

When I was in high school, I had the body that was chiselled by a plastic surgeon. I’d wear my swimming costume and frolic around the pool but when the time for my age group to get into the water I’d disappear like weed around Miley Cyrus. Now, at 25, after reading an article in the INDUNA MAGAZINE, I realised that swimming is a life skill. (Yes, I waited for an article to tell me that.)

boity-thulo

Boitumelo Thulo

But there’s new extenuating circumstances that circumvent this from happening. Firstly, I weigh a whole lot more than 54kgs now and I have like 4-5 different skin tones on my body. Outchea looking like I’m wearing camouflage. The problem areas for NORMAL black girls, you know, the knees, the elbows and the butt. And to top it all off, I have a tummy that’s debatably as big as my butt. To be fair my butt isn’t that big. With all the airbrushed images of all the girls in the media you’d also think twice before stripping into the bare minimum.

So, swimming is officially getting a no from me.

6 Responses
  • erech apayim av harachumim
    December 31, 2016

    Hahahaha is this about swimming or about hot and sexy bebz.

  • تحميل اغانى
    January 18, 2017

    Hello,I log on to your blog named “I don’t swim! Thank you. – Thembi Terry Zulu” daily.Your writing style is awesome, keep doing what you’re doing! And you can look our website about تحميل اغانى.

  • how to plan a small wedding
    January 21, 2017

    Hi,I check your blogs named “I don’t swim! Thank you. – Thembi Terry Zulu” daily.Your writing style is awesome, keep it up! And you can look our website about how to plan a small wedding.

  • blog here
    February 8, 2017

    I just want to tell you that I’m very new to blogging and site-building and truly loved this blog site. Very likely I’m going to bookmark your site . You amazingly have impressive articles. Many thanks for revealing your website page.

What Are Your Thoughts?

%d bloggers like this: