Whose fault is it that your life is in shambles? When you lie awake and take stock of the debris that is your life, under whose tab do you put the bill under? If you could arrest one person for the ruins that your life is, who would it be?

The correct answer is YOURSELF! You are the only one responsible for your life and it’s time to regain your control.

I am a firm believer that we are a result of the choices that we make. Ask yourself, but when exactly did my life take a wrong turn into a blockbuster horror movie or an Emmy award winning drama?

I previously wrote a blog post about how witches don’t exist, what was interesting about that blog post was the video I included of some guy saying people who believe in witches don’t want to take responsibility for their failures so they fob it off on someone else, a mythical creature working against them in the shadows. You can’t fathom that things went south because you downright failed.

You can’t change what you don’t think is your fault.

Do you believe that the Government, your parents or your upbringing are the real cause of your demise? This might come as a news flash but whatever you have gone through is not original to you. You do not have a fresh hell specific to you. The difference between you and all the others who conquered that experience is how they handled it or reacted to it. You have complete power over that. Your parents weren’t nazu oans, neither were the parents of most people in this country but did we die though? We make do with what we have and keep it moving. What are you doing to ensure that you’re a nazu oan for your kids? Wallowing and drinking Bronco by the street corners won’t cut it.

We have to teach our kids to take responsibility for their actions.

It starts with the little things, having your child pick up after themselves, having them look after a pot plant, being responsible for certain chores in the house. Having responsibilities teaches them consequences. If I don’t take my plate to the sink, it won’t be washed. If I don’t water the plant, it will die. It will teach them while they’re still young that everything has a consequence and you have the power to set things in motion.

When the consequences are positive you hear people fighting over taking credit. When the consequences are negative, no one is scrambling to collect their share, all of a sudden it’s called the blame game.

My favourite anthem for people who do not want to take responsibility for their actions is Akon’s Put the blame on me. Akon got caught for sex with an underage girl, there was outrage, he cost Gwen Stefani big money. His idea of taking responsibility for his actions was releasing a whole song dishing out blame to everyone as if they were there when he caught an erection and pulled his pants down. He is a married man with several wives what business did he have putting his dirty bits in someone not any of his wives? Truth is, he leaned into his lust, had his fun, bust a nut and blamed everyone like they were there in the room with him. Riddle me this, how many other married men have gone to nightclubs and not had sex with strange underage girls?

Avoiding responsibility is evading the chance of becoming a better person. It’s also you refusing to be taught something to help you get through life. I understand that kids nowadays have rights but they still need to learn that if you do the crime, you must do the time. Jail is still a thing. As the child gets older, the consequences for their actions are more punitive and they need to learn that.

Today, I want you to dig deep to your defining moment of ruin and ask yourself, honestly, with love, how much responsibility you need to take for what happened. What could you have done differently? What were the learning points or key lessons? Who do you owe an apology? How do you move past it or heal from it?

Only then will you realise that taking responsibility is the closure you owe to yourself.