When you walk past windis they will try their luck on almost every woman that walks by at the bus terminal. They will do this day in, day out without fail and they never tire. How many “No’s” do you think they get per day? I’m sure they get a “Yes” once in a while but they will continue to pursue women with such intensity and such passion despite the rejection.

This is the mentality that we need to adopt into our lives.

Speaking for myself, I had a phobia of failing. The next level of fear. My fear of failure was so severe that I wouldn’t even start on an idea because I was that afraid of failure. I’d think about it and talk myself out of an idea before I even dared to try. In my heart I knew the idea was great but my mind kept telling me a thousand ways it could fail.

Until I heard the podcast that changed my life!

This podcast is called “100 Days of Healing and Overcoming the Fear of Rejection.” I first came across it on Twitter and I was interested because I knew my struggle with rejection. I had to listen to it three times in its entirety for my mind to fully grasp it. I kept thinking, why does this sound so simple and yet so hard. The one thing he asked of us is to seek rejection on PURPOSE! I thought WOW, the way I hate rejection and now I have to actively seek it out? Could never be me.

His reasoning was that, if you can build up an immunity to rejection then you’ll be able to handle it as it comes. He told us to write outrageous proposals, apply for jobs that we aren’t qualified for, ask for things that you never thought you could get. He went on to say how he was shocked by the numbers of “Yes” responses that he received from his outrageous proposals. We literally have not because we ask not.

In your pursuit of rejection, dare to dream.

You see, I like to play it safe. I will not venture into something if I don’t have a 90% chance that I will win. Anything with less than a 90% gets discarded. This is how I stayed in the comfort zone and protected myself from pain, failure and rejection. I then watched the TedX video by Reshma Saujani. She says that we should teach girls to be brave and not to strive for perfection. She goes on to explain that women will only apply for a job if they meet 100% of the requirements whereas men will apply if they meet only 60% of the qualifications.  

Thanks for coming to her TedX talk.

Because the economy is so bad, we need to start dreaming outrageous dreams. The environment we have been living in is not following any of the rules, why should we? Business unusual requires unusual dreams.

2 Comments

  • Rumbie
    Posted 11th March 2019 4:07 pm 0Likes

    This is deep Thembi, never really deeply thought about this before. ❤️ It’s amazing that I learn something every time I read your blog. Thank you.

    Chef Rumbie 💋

    • Thembi Terry Zulu
      Posted 25th April 2019 11:01 am 0Likes

      Thank you. I been telling you to start a blog. We are alike in a lot of ways and the world is waiting to hear your story.

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