#4 How Not To…Text Thembi Terry

Zimbabwean Blogger Thembi Terry Zulu WhatsApp

WhatsApp is the most convenient mode of communication. My phonebook has 1400 contacts but only 1000 of them are on WhatsApp. It’s a miracle that I am in only 12 WhatsApp groups. Nobody is on my blocked list. Those that add me to broadcast lists just get culled from the phonebook. If you have ever texted me and didn’t get a response from me, listed below are the possible reasons why.

 

Don’t Text Me in Shorthand

I cannot stress this enough. Call me the grammar police I do not care. If you are texting Thembi Terry, you’ll use proper English. For those that didn’t know, I am a copywriter by day, so I literally get paid to spell shit correctly. I’m quite a big deal now, so when you come at me, come correct. Would you use shorthand in your CV, dissertation or business proposal?

I think not. When you’re texting a boss, text like a boss.

 

If You Don’t Text First…

Messages come in by the flood. I usually respond to each and every one of them. I am reactionary when it comes to communication on WhatsApp. If you text, I’ll reply. If you don’t text, I won’t text you first. I am extremely busy, as is everyone in advertising, so I try and text first when it’s really important. It’s not that I hate you, its just priorities.

 

Don’t Text Me to Entertain You

Oh, this one is for the people that text you to tell you that they are bored. I dislike these messages the most. So what must happen now? I must drop everything that I am doing, put on a suit, jump from a plane and entertain you? What this tells me is that you had no intention to text me otherwise. If you had been having the time of your life, you would not have picked up the phone to text me. I am the emergency excitement kit. For instant time-pushing entertainment text Thembi Terry. Not having none of it, bye.

 

Don’t Demand A Response

I can see you are online, why aren’t you replying me?” Firstly, you are not the only contact in my phonebook. Secondly, you were tried, you were tested, and your message was found trivial. There is a hierarchy to how I reply messages. Work messages first, followed by money messages, family texts and then everybody else. “Its just the way the game is played its best if you just wait your turn.”- Rihanna x The Wait Is Over

 

Don’t Beat Around the Bush

When somebody needs a favor, they feel the need to start off with trivial niceties. They will send a ‘Hi’ and wait for you to respond. I usually don’t respond to these greetings. When you text me, just get straight to the point. “Hi Thembi, hoping you are well. I am texting you regarding…..” Its as simple as that. When I finally get around to your message, I’ll respond accordingly, instead of having to wait for our schedules to match for a useless back and forth.

 

What are some of the things that annoy you on WhatsApp?

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